“Conflict: a lack of awareness of the imminence of death”.
This is one of the best definitions of conflict that I have seen. It comes from one of my favourite books about dispute resolution, “Mediating Dangerously” by Kenneth Cloke.
I am often taken aback at how easy it is for all of us, me included, to forget how short our time on earth really is. And how unimportant most of the things are that cause us daily distress.
A good friend just finished the El Camino, an 800 km trek through France and Spain. His journey too reminded me that life is short, its pleasures great, and its conflicts often not worth getting one’s knickers in a knot about.
Those of us in the field of family mediation find ourselves often facing people in dire distress, usually over things that will not matter much in the long run. And yet we cannot judge them because, at the time and to them, these things are important. But we can, gently and compassionately, try to help them gain some of the perspective that my El Camino pilgrim friend acquired without having to get all those blisters.
This photo comes from an island in Georgian Bay, one of my favourite places to reflect, rejuvenate and appreciate all the great things life gives us.
