{"id":7839,"date":"2013-02-04T09:00:32","date_gmt":"2013-02-04T14:00:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/?p=7839"},"modified":"2017-08-29T10:59:02","modified_gmt":"2017-08-29T14:59:02","slug":"a-parenting-schedule-that-makes-sense","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/news-resources\/blog\/a-parenting-schedule-that-makes-sense\/","title":{"rendered":"A Parenting Schedule that \u201cmakes sense\u201d."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"kids\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Children in two homes can thrive if the parents can work together to meet their needs.<\/p>\n

When discussing Parenting schedules, I start off by asking parents to tell me about their child\u2014describe their personality, likes, dislikes, sensitivities, how they deal with change, how they experience the world\u2026the list goes on.<\/p>\n

Everything that is discussed around parenting should incorporate the perspective of a child.\u00a0\u00a0 For example, a child who is more reserved, takes time when change is presented, finds comfort in his\/her surroundings, may find transitions very difficult.\u00a0 Finding strategies to help with the transitions is important and should be discussed and incorporated into a parenting schedule.\u00a0 I often say to parents, \u201cyour child needs to get grounded before they can fully engage, so we need to figure out ways to do so, that would help your child.\u201d<\/p>\n

Often times, parents come in trying to fit the child in their schedule, which can be very stressful. \u00a0Parents need to understand that children have a different understanding of what is \u201cfair\u201d.\u00a0 Parents will often ask for equal time because it is the \u201cfair\u201d thing to do.\u00a0 The question is, \u201cfair to whom?\u201d\u00a0 Kids do not divide their love for parents on a 50\/50 basis.\u00a0 Kids often say that living with each of their parents equally has nothing to do with how much they love them.\u00a0 Having said that, a 50\/50 schedule can work for some children, but it should not be a formula.<\/p>\n

Children should not just \u201ctolerate\u201d the schedule, but rather we should be designing a schedule the \u201cmakes sense\u201d to the child so s\/he can thrive.<\/p>\n

My dad used to tell me that a child was like a plant, starting off as a seed and depending on the amount of sun, water and the soil\u2019s richness, the seed will either flourish into a beautiful strong flower or wither. Depending on the species of the plant, it may require full sun light versus partial.\u00a0 This applies to the schedule.\u00a0 Some children, depending on age and temperament may require more access time with a parent that s\/he is craving.<\/p>\n

Perhaps calling it a \u201cchild\u2019s schedule\u201d instead of a \u201cparenting schedule\u201d is more appropriate. When figuring out a schedule that works for your family, take a moment and imagine what it feels like for your child.\u00a0 Now, imagine if there is conflict between you and the other parent, there is another layer your child has to negotiate.<\/p>\n

As parents, we can do a lot for our children so they can thrive in two homes. Creating a schedule that \u201cmakes sense\u201d from the child\u2019s perspective, and supporting the other parent is an excellent start.<\/p>\n

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\"\"<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tips for making your parenting plan child-friendly.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[60,974,676],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7839"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7839"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7839\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7839"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7839"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.riverdalemediation.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7839"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}