Today I spent the day in court.
I was the free on-site mediator at mediate393 in Toronto.
This service is available in all Ontario courts and is often a remarkable experience for the parties and mediator alike.
Take today. The first case was referred by the judge who felt that the case conference needed some mediation. There was apparently only one issue: retroactive support.
One party had a lawyer, the other didn’t. After a couple hours of negotiation, it became clear that the parties wanted to settle everything. They each knew what they wanted and, after two years of litigation, were ready.
They had both needed the chance to stand back, look at the big picture from the perspective of someone new and impartial, be heard by a neutral person and also by each other, consider their options fully, and make a deal.
It wasn’t the best deal for either; it also wasn’t the worst. It was, however, good enough for both.
And the cost to them? Aside from legal fees, nothing. The unrepresented party will get legal advice on the proposed settlement but was as happy with the outcome as the other party.
The next case was not so easy. Again, the issue brought to mediation was apparently a simple one; spousal support. But the parties ended up talking about many other things, including their kids. By the end of it, we were all crying.
Mediation offers people a chance to explore, in a safe place, the real issues that are holding them back from moving on or making a settlement with each other. Although mediation statistics are often used to value its success, the truth is that mediation is not about whether or not the case settled. It is about whether the people left the process in a better place than when they started.
It is a privilege to do this work and I thank my clients every day for giving me the opportunity to keep learning and growing in what I do.
